Never forget, never forgotten

IMG_7424bw, originally uploaded by TH.Photography.

How someone can be on your mind even more than every day I'm not sure, but Ma has been there for several weeks. Tomorrow we mourn again as a year passes since she went to heaven. Her passing was peaceful, and the Lord was close to me and to her wonderful son in her death.  My wonderful husband stood alone to speak at his mom's  funeral. As is true to his personality, he has mourned this grief largely alone for 365 days. That makes me sad. Sometimes I see a bit of denial washing away as tears stream down his cheeks; other times we can enjoy a laugh as we recall times together. Always, every singe day, we think of her and we miss her.
Ma said to me once as she knew her time on earth was drawing to a close, "You won't ever forget me, will you Tami?" (She almost never called me by name.) We laughed in my reply that that would indeed be impossible even if I wanted to.
No, I'll never forget her and I'll never stop talking about her.
Ways we remember you, Ma:
*buttering toast
*cooking chicken for dinner, "Chicken 'ain't nothin' but a bird."
*Halloween witches handing out candy to the kids

*truffles

*your rocker sitting here idle and empty
*Nicholas starting a sentence, "Nanny..."

*rushing home to fix your meal...or not

Wow, Here I was prepared to keep listing, but the truth is, everything reminds us of you. Our house is not the same anymore. Our pain hasn't subsided in our loss, but we trust the Lord knowing your pain is gone and our loss is such a great gain for you.

Lawrence Welk was on Saturday night, I've never actually stopped to watch him before but know you never missed your weekend date. I stopped. I listened and I think I heard you singing along and I know I saw you dancing...this time on the streets of gold and surrounded with a choir of angels. One day we'll see you again.

Until then:
Never forgotten. Always missed.
We love you, Ma.